A few months ago Coca-Cola redesigned the plastic bottle caps on their 20oz. bottles. They are now shorter and stylized like the old metal bottle caps your great-great grandfather had to pry off with his wooden dentures.
I swear to God once you take these things off they will never go on straight again without your full and undivided attention.
I’m not the world’s smartest man but I’ve conditioned myself to expect to be able to remove and replace a bottle cap with relative ease and now I encounter failure everyday. I’m still a seasoned master at removing and replacing the bottle caps on two litre bottles so it would seem Coca-Cola is out to drive me insane with deliberate poor engineering.
Hey, fuck you Coca-Cola and fuck your maddening new bottle caps.
{ 8 comments… read them below or add one }
It’s Coke’s way of telling you to switch to Postum, GRANDPA.
It’s Coke’s way of making the pop go flat faster, thus forcing you to buy more.
Why can’t you drink a 20 oz. Coke in one sitting? Are you nursing your Coke or something?
Postum rocks your socks off. That wonderfully folky hot beverage beats out nasty Coke any day, dentures or no.
I can Omar but I like the comfort of a closed bottle of pop near my computer.
Sadly Postum is no longer being produced, as of a few months ago. Doesn’t THAT make y’all feel old? Now I’m off to send a telegram and take some Polaroids…
Maybe you are just getting old. Manual dexterity may not be the first thing to go, but it is near the top.
Damnit.